Ladies and Gentlemen, His Holiness, Dr. Ahmed Al Haddad, the "Grand Mufti" of Dubai.
“In Islam, choosing your life partner is a personal freedom,” he said, speaking at a Ramadan majlis on Sunday night. “But personal freedoms can be restricted for the benefit of the public interest.”
Mixed marriages are more likely to end in divorce and their children are more likely to commit crimes, some experts at the majilis said.
“There should be very specific circumstances for when such marriages are allowed,” Dr al Haddad said. “Such as when a man is too old and cannot find an Emirati to marry him, or when he wants to take a third of fourth wife for certain reasons and no Emirati woman agrees to do so.”
Mixed marriages are more likely to end in divorce and their children are more likely to commit crimes, some experts at the majilis said.
“There should be very specific circumstances for when such marriages are allowed,” Dr al Haddad said. “Such as when a man is too old and cannot find an Emirati to marry him, or when he wants to take a third of fourth wife for certain reasons and no Emirati woman agrees to do so.”
41 comments:
Your title is in very bad taste. And I agree with him 110%.
It wasnt a public statement nor was it made in his capacity as the mufti Of Dubai. These were his personal opinions stated in a casual majlis and was his responses to other people's questions in that majlis.
Also, what right do YOU have to call him an Idiot?
Just to clarify, this was not a public statement and as Ultra mentioned it was a personal opinion. There is some sense to it.
Faisal - exactly it was his personal opinion and shared in his(very public) Majlis. It made news, because he is the Grand Mufti.
Mixed marriages (I'm an offspring) have as much positives to the alternative. You can be on the wrong side of the tracks due to a whole load of reasons, least of all the different cultures the parent share. In fact, kids from mixed marriages have the best of both worlds. It extends the opportunity to experience and accept varied cultures and ways of life - that beyond the man made borders / cultural restrictions imposed we are all people with a lot in common.
You know what I shouldn't have used that phrase. Comment deleted.
Im all for different cultures coming together, except in the UAE's case.
It had very little negative impact in a society where the norms are posted, and thus the real norm.
But in a society where the actual norms are all imported, and where the norms that should be are in themselves a minority, taking a foreign wife just adds to the corrosion of that culture.
If Emiratis made up 90% of the population, and thus our culture was inherently protected, then that would be fine.
But in our situation, No. I am dead against it.
And as many of you know, I myself am a product of a "half half" marriage.
Rosh, Your saying I THINK HE'S AN IDIOT is different than saying HE's an idiot.
The fact that he is where he is is proof that he at least was smart enough to get there.
But nothing he said was wrong, or out of line. He is not speaking in general terms, but specifically to the UAE's situation. And banning mixed marriages is, I must admit, a viable helt to preserving the Emirati culture. You have to admit that much.
Being "half half" also means I have many friends who are the same. And about 25% of them agree with the Mufti's opinions, in the UAE's situation.
We arent saying that all offspring of a mixed marriage are on their way to a jail cell. But on average, they are more likely to have a diminished "Emirati-ness"
Of course, this also varies depending on where the wife is from. A child born to a British woman who isnt muslim is more likely to lose a connection to our culture than someone with say... A Syrian mother.
Again, there is no right or wrong answer, and generalizing will in the end cost us logic. But you cant deny that, if we want our culture to be preserved, steps must be taken. And this could be one (of many)
That's all fine and dandy in theory. The reality, the practicalities in life in the increasingly global world we live in, is quite different.
Cultures do not erode because people from different backgrounds come into it, or learn about it. In fact it grows. Perhaps some people need to have more faith and belief in their culture, and less cynicism in people they know little about (and I mean that well).
"But in our situation, No. I am dead against it."
You, are somebody from a mixed marriage. You are engaged, (and inshallah) to be married to a soul from a mixed race, with zero 'Emirati' gene, if you will.
Cultures do not remain stagnant indefinitely. They evolve. That is what human beings do.
If you think my title is in bad taste, then so be it. It is meant to point out the insanity of people assigning "specialists" in handling with God, something that the prophet never concurred with. It is of course, along with Imams and the whole religious order, an invention. And by supporting the banning something which is our right as human beings and muslims to do, in order to please someone in this majlis, the "Mufti".
Agree with him as much as you want ultra. The fact remains that his comments are unscientific, unwarranted and downright racist.
What is the Emirati society ? As far as I can define it it is the collection of people who are bound together by common ancestry in the UAE. An Emirati is not racial, and culture evolves all the time, it does not stay the same whether you and me like it or not.
The day we introduce anti-miscengenation laws it the day we start to go down the path of Saudi Arabia, which is held at the mercy of the Criminal and vial Muttawa.
Salafist-Developed artificial Shariah has no place in government. Men of religion have no place in government. The UAE's success is built on exactly that.
Actually I rather like the way Saudi Arabia works... I think if we took some of their ways, and got rid of some of ours, we'd be in a good place. They are too much to the right, and we too much to the left. Somewhere in between is something good.
The prophet was against it partly because it was not needed then. Why? because the PROPHET was alive.
But as soon as he died the layman Muslim needed more learned people to at very least give their learned opinions.
You can argue that the current reality of how Islamic countries rule is wrong, and i'd agree with you. But the need for people who understand the religion in depth has always been there and it is a need.
Rosh, cultures erode for many reasons, one of them is when that culture is under attack by an enormous external threat. We are in that situation. Our govt has allowed our people, and thus culture, to all but die in it's own country. Unacceptable.
The facts that I am from a mixed background and am to be married to another foreigner makes my agreeing with these views more real.
It is easy for someone like this Mufti to say these things without knowing the other side. It is real when someone like me says the same.
Culture may "grow" but its in a way and direction that I do not agree with.
What is the Emirati society ? As far as I can define it it is the collection of people who are bound together by common ancestry in the UAE.
False, Not even that. I actually go through these topics here:
http://www.al-emarati.com/2010/07/we-people-undefined.html
I'm slowly coming to a working definition, but I know what Emirati is NOT. And a mixed marriage adds a risk, maybe that risk wont materialize, but it adds one all the same.
The UAE's success is built on exactly that.
What success? We have no successes. We have tall buildings, prostitutes, a generation who might as well be American, and we are a minority in our own country.
The UAE is built on greed of the upper classes, slavery of those who have no choices, and treating it's citizens like children.
That's the truth.
"Actually I rather like the way Saudi Arabia works... I think if we took some of their ways, and got rid of some of ours, we'd be in a good place. They are too much to the right, and we too much to the left. Somewhere in between is something good."
Yes, mass unemployment, a corrupt government. Women who dont drive, religious police beating people on the streets. A tyrannical dictatorship which only cares about its own skin. Delightful.
"The prophet was against it partly because it was not needed then. Why? because the PROPHET was alive. But as soon as he died the layman Muslim needed more learned people to at very least give their learned opinions."
Needed, in the time of illiteracy and ignorance. In a modern information world, not needed.
"You can argue that the current reality of how Islamic countries rule is wrong, and i'd agree with you. But the need for people who understand the religion in depth has always been there and it is a need."
This is again, a fabricated need for something spiritual, which is supposed to be God-made. Unless youre of the school of thought that believes all religions are man-made.
"The facts that I am from a mixed background and am to be married to another foreigner makes my agreeing with these views more real."
And you think that Emiratis should be banned to marrying foreigners as the Dubai Pope stated himself?
"It is easy for someone like this Mufti to say these things without knowing the other side. It is real when someone like me says the same."
It is from experience when you say it, but your personal experiences dont dictate what other should do.
"Culture may grow but its in a way and direction that I do not agree with."
The thing is, culture grows whether you like it or not. It changes and metamorphoses. It never stays the same. We have a completely different culture to our ancestors, and we cannot change that.
"I'm slowly coming to a working definition, but I know what Emirati is NOT. And a mixed marriage adds a risk, maybe that risk wont materialize, but it adds one all the same."
You cannot define it and I dont think you ever will. Because many people before you have tried to define it for their own cultures and failed. What is an American ? What is a Japanese person? Undefinable.
"What success? We have no successes. We have tall buildings, prostitutes, a generation who might as well be American, and we are a minority in our own country.
The UAE is built on greed of the upper classes, slavery of those who have no choices, and treating it's citizens like children.
That's the truth."
I would agree with the second paragraph partially, but the UAE employs and helps millions of people all over the world. Its citizens have the best quality of life, many people have built their lives here and It is a net positive force in this world ! If you detest the UAE so much, Saudi Arabia is a wonderful alternative.
This country has been a huge force of good, mostly for those who are not citizens of this country. I will agree that a huge part of this country's citizen base are almost everything they need, but there are literally tens of thousands that scrape by.
If we are all equal as citizens, by are some scraping by while others have billions that are NOT from their own work?
You are right to call the leaders in the KSA as you did, but lest not pretend please. Better isnt always good.
But in the end you and I are a minority in our own country, a country that is full of and is now known for it's filth and un islamic ways. All this under the eyes of those who supposedly want the best for us.
If that were the case, if everyone wanted our best interests, then you wouldnt have a need to post this very post. Would you?
Greed by upper classes, who never cared and still dont about the negative social and cultural aspects of amassing their wealth, slavery, pure and simple, and treating us like children.
"The facts that I am from a mixed background and am to be married to another foreigner makes my agreeing with these views more real."
The fact you support his views in theory when you believe in, and practice the exact opposite, imply your comment is just background noise. I mean, why would you support any view and practice the opposite if you didn’t TRULY believe in it. So, perhaps ask yourself - does marrying a foreigner really erode, or does it spread my culture? Think about it without the cynicism. I think you know the answer. I’m not saying mixed marriage is the way for everybody and there are no negatives -- but there are a lot of positives that can come of it.
The fact you support his views in theory when you believe in, and practice the exact opposite, imply your comment is just background noise. I mean, why would you support any view and practice the opposite if you didn’t TRULY believe in it.
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The above is the truth and shows your true colors Mr ultrablue.If you are honestly against something you will not follow it yourself. You will do everything in your power from preventing the same "mistake" to happen again.Your argument is very weak for that.It means you are a hypocrite. Your foreign girlfriend must be so hot that you forgot your -holy principles-......i think they call that selling out in the US.Tell us how the proposed law would work in your favor?
Tell us how the proposed law would work in your favor?
In MY favor? Well it would decrease the likelihood of my culture being eroded. Pretty favorable outcome, no?
The fact you support his views in theory when you believe in, and practice the exact opposite, imply your comment is just background noise. I mean, why would you support any view and practice the opposite if you didn’t TRULY believe in it. So, perhaps ask yourself - does marrying a foreigner really erode, or does it spread my culture? Think about it without the cynicism. I think you know the answer. I’m not saying mixed marriage is the way for everybody and there are no negatives -- but there are a lot of positives that can come of it.
I did state that it does depend on where the proposed foreign wife would come from no? And that an Australian would be a huge risk when a Syrian less of one, no?
But in the end, if a ban was made, I am willing to set aside my personal freedom and want for the greater good. Which I think was almost a direct quote of the Mufti's.
Tell us how the proposed law would work in your favor?
In MY favor? Well it would decrease the likelihood of my culture being eroded. Pretty favorable outcome, no?
The fact you support his views in theory when you believe in, and practice the exact opposite, imply your comment is just background noise. I mean, why would you support any view and practice the opposite if you didn’t TRULY believe in it. So, perhaps ask yourself - does marrying a foreigner really erode, or does it spread my culture? Think about it without the cynicism. I think you know the answer. I’m not saying mixed marriage is the way for everybody and there are no negatives -- but there are a lot of positives that can come of it.
I did state that it does depend on where the proposed foreign wife would come from no? And that an Australian would be a huge risk when a Syrian less of one, no?
But in the end, if a ban was made, I am willing to set aside my personal freedom and want for the greater good. Which I think was almost a direct quote of the Mufti's.
Tell us how the proposed law would work in your favor?
In MY favor? Well it would decrease the likelihood of my culture being eroded. Pretty favorable outcome, no?
The fact you support his views in theory when you believe in, and practice the exact opposite, imply your comment is just background noise. I mean, why would you support any view and practice the opposite if you didn’t TRULY believe in it. So, perhaps ask yourself - does marrying a foreigner really erode, or does it spread my culture? Think about it without the cynicism. I think you know the answer. I’m not saying mixed marriage is the way for everybody and there are no negatives -- but there are a lot of positives that can come of it.
I did state that it does depend on where the proposed foreign wife would come from no? And that an Australian would be a huge risk when a Syrian less of one, no?
But in the end, if a ban was made, I am willing to set aside my personal freedom and want for the greater good. Which I think was almost a direct quote of the Mufti's.
"I did state that it does depend on where the proposed foreign wife would come from no? And that an Australian would be a huge risk when a Syrian less of one, no?"
It does get subjective doesn't it? And here's something else – please, do not generalize. For all we know, an Ozzie might just get along and accept the UAE ways better to a Jord. Why? Coz there are the good apples and the gold diggers in every basket. Just because someone is Arab and a Muslim, does not mean they shall accept the ways of life in your culture. It starts with mutual respect for one another, love, care and understanding – least of all one’s origin. It also has a lot to do with the affection one feels towards the land. Your culture grows through the love and the understanding you share with the other soul. I speak from personal experience.
Anyway, for what it is worth, I apologize bringing up your personal matter into the debate, and to your Fiancé. I was only trying to show, acceptance of one's culture is dependent on many factors. May the good guy up above bless your lives with love / happiness and happily ever after.
You just proved what I said before. This kind of law is too generalized + biased and shouldnt be applied to every Emaraty because not all of them are the same!! There are various cases and circumstances that bring 2 people together.Yours seem to work otherwise why decide to marry a foreign woman even when in theory you don't support mixed marriages?? Who are you to say that it will not work for other couples? Your situation is not something special or rarity..... Others deserve that chance too and they can take that risk if they please.You are either lying to yourself, to us or both!
Anon it's ok. He is unable admit he likes the foreign meat. Says 1 thing and does another thing. He is all talk talk talk. At the end he is banging a white girl. That's what shows his REAL BELIEFS.Firefox was commenter on my blog. I shall pass on the news to her. From the foreign wife of a LOCAL MAN :]
Alice, stop annoying me before I come on to your blog and start telling you what I think of Russian women.
Rosh:
It does get subjective doesn't it? And here's something else – please, do not generalize. For all we know, an Ozzie might just get along and accept the UAE ways better to a Jord. Why? Coz there are the good apples and the gold diggers in every basket.
I never stated that it wasnt subjective, nor did I say that EVERY muslim arab woman would make a good wife. However, on average, you have to agree that someone from a culture closer to your own will be more inclined to see eye to eye on more issues.
For example, If I were to enact a ban, I would not ban any of the GCC countries, simply because they might as well be the same country, The cultural differences are very basic.
The farther you move away from the UAE geographically, the more of a difference here will be in terms of religion, culture, and social norms.
Yes, there are SOME women from the US or Canada or China that can accept and assimilate into the UAE culture.
But on average, will do you think its more likely for a Qatari girl to do so or an American?
On average. The Qatari of course. Because aside from the huge cobra of a sufra on the guys heads, I see no difference.
It'll be harder to get someone who was a different religion, and used to parenting a specific way, and dressing a specific way, to change than someone who already adopts your ways 99%.
See what I'm saying?
The question is, do you want to take the added risk of having your kids end up Emirati by passport only? Without the language, religion, culture, and social attributes of an Emirati?
May the good guy up above bless your lives with love / happiness and happily ever after.
See, my conversations with you are always informative till the end when you turn into the hippy you are!
You are either lying to yourself, to us or both!
Oh I lie alot, to make my point.or to annoy people. Ask Rosh, he's seen it 1st hand. Infact, for all you know, Im not from a mixed marriage, arent engaged, and am not a guy.
firefox, you are adorable... lol :)
"I never stated that it wasnt subjective"
You didn't. Grandpa Mutfi did. This debate was all about grandpa's stone age views.
I agree with some of what you say. You and Björk (the Duck lady from Iceland) or the b***** from B’wood may never gel.
That said, count your blessings mate, you've been blessed with a soul mate, most sane men would die for. It doesn't get any better if she were an 'Emirati'. Period.
Better tell your Sheikhs and rulers not to marry foreigners either then. Who's gonna break the news to Princess Haya?
Thanks,Rosh.
Hey Ultra Blue, it wasn't me commenting before! LOL! Threatening to come to my blog to upset me with telling "what you think of Russian women" - very noble of you, thanks.
If I ever feel a need to exchange opinions with you, I'll do it under my own name.
All the comments are very insightful. I like to learn more about this topic as I'm in a mixed marriage too.
I agree with most comments, including Ultra Blue's last comment that marriages may work better for people from similar cultures.
Yet there's been a LOT of divorces in the GCC among local couples lately, even though they come from same culture. Some men after failing to build a life with a local woman/women say they'll never marry an Emirati again. But the opposite happens too- there are a lot of irresponsible players who change their foreign wives all the time.
Like someone wrote already, that if mixed marriages work very well for some people, others should not be banned from trying. It's about personal freedom to choose how to live. Everybody is different, some people may succeed in this hard task of building a successful multicultural family (actually building any marriage is a hard task) and be very happy, and maybe preserve some of the local culture or enrich it.
Sometimes an Australian (or whatever nationality) woman can feel more protective of local culture than even a local woman. Some local people may take culture, traditions, language,history for granted, while some foreign mothers understand they have to work harder to instill love for local culture in their children. And that's what I often see. There are foreign women, including myself, that try to learn and to love this culture themselves and to pass this love and respect, knowledge to their children.
I agree with those who say that culture inevitably changes. Foreign wives or no foreign wives, culture will change and evolve, some things will be left behind, some traditions lost, some new things will appear.
I just hope that soon Emirati women will have the same freedom to marry foreign men and bring them into the culture if they wish, as local men can freely marry foreign women.
Rosh Great comments, I love your very wise, mature, tolerant way of thinking.
This discussion is getting more informative actually rather than the post.Anyway great.
Can somebody please explain what the fuzz is all about !!!
Informative.Thanks.
Where have I been in this powderkeg!?
@emirati
"Men of religion have no place in government."...
Disagree entirely, a happy balance can be met. Our Sharia inheritance laws are an example.
...
@ultra
"The prophet was against it partly because it was not needed then."
I both agree and disagree. We follow sharia though prophets do not walk among men... This is a discussion with more depth than we can swim in.
"Australian would be a huge risk when a Syrian less of one, no?"
Not to comment on your life decisions. Islamically, you marry to one of exceptional moral character.
Wouldn't be a popular belief system if we broke it down to countries now huh?
"But on average, will do you think its more likely .." ...
I wouldnt play a statistics exercise with my life decision... Qatari marriage statistics were out recently... Alice is right btw. An average of 40%-60% depending when you read it.
Hope it works out.
nice one have to love it because no way out.
Thanks for sharing the article. I was really wondering and i get here and get amazed by the article. Hope that we will get more ahead.
I was just wondering and i got here, I really gt amazed by the blog. Very informaive and very helpfull thanks for providing the post. Hope that we will get more in future.
Hai
I also agree your statement.. People especially gulf people, "Do n't accept to the man who is old or who is another religion or who is having another wives"...But here i seen lot of people will marry the man for his money and money......... Even though our religion give the permission to the marry, we have to think by laterally...Instead of that, We have to do something for emirati society in the name of services, education, and so on....
Criminals hideout in Dubai: Is it time to investigate rogue men behind ExoticCarsDubai, the ExoticGroup and the SpiceLounge in Dubia hideouts? See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCfBWBTAk3Y and read the ending credits as well as the video description...
Sorry, your personal experience was not good but this is always not true.
good 3li ..
and yes its not true all the time...
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